SUFFERING INTO CONSCIOUSNESS ORIGINAL ARTWORK

This new piece is an exciting venture - I'll explain more on the concept as I complete the painting, but I thought I'd share where I'm at with my journey as an artist.

I often plan out my paintings, sometimes to the point where all serendipity is eliminated. I know what I am going to create. I design the painting, then I paint it. 
This was enjoyable in the early days, to mock up an idea and know with confidence I could replicate a hand rendered image of it.
However, on reflection, I realised that all the creativity was happening before I'd even put pencil to paper, or brush to canvas. I'd plan every detail so meticulously, that it was becoming a little stifling.

The real 'magic' is getting lost in a creation, by being clear on the message but allowing freedom in the execution. Trusting without thinking. Thinking too much can lead to judgement and criticism - A real hindrance. 

I was thinking back to some of my very first paintings, when I hadn't even attempted to paint a portrait before. There was no expectation,  just freedom of expression. It was fun, exhilarating even. Time wouldn't exist in those moments, the painting would come alive in an unexpected way. It would own its presence on the canvas, almost choosing its own colours.

I suppose, from then, as I kept painting, some of that initial freedom got a little lost. I set an expectation for my artwork. The ego started talking to me, demanding the next painting to be better than its predecessor. 

Each month that passes, I am discovering new realisations as I grow as an artist. Whatever happens, the most important thing is to love the process, and love creating. To hold onto the essence of 'play', so that feeling somehow becomes part of the painting. 

This new painting is taking me back to the beginning. I had a vision of a concept, but I haven't planned it too tightly. I'm letting this one breath and have its own voice. I can't wait to see what it says...I'll keep you posted.